You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
