do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize