Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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