I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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