ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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