Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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