If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
