Farmville is her only friend.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
