He is such a slut. More and more my type.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Well I just put wine in my tea
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
