Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize