i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Boobs are out for the taking
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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