i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
