Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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