just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
