I forgot how hot balto sounded
I love having hate sex.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
