you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
