Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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