He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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