How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
