eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Everything about him screamed your future.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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