he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
