It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
