Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
