How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
