doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
