Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize