why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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