do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
