I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
