I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
tequila makes me forget i have legs
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
