i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
