Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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