He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
