You're my little dorito
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
