I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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