I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
