grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
