You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
i out mim tonsoeep
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