We're like a lot better than the average bears
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
