we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
