oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I need water and some morals
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
