Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
