This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
