Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
