So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize