Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
