Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize