I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
