problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
