watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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