we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
