she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
