Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
